END IS NEAR (Friday funnies)

Hello

After a long silence I am back on my blog. Hope you all had a great year so far.  Below is a joke arrived in my in box. Thought I will share with you . Have a great weekend.

Saba

12.04.2018

 

END IS NEAR

Sean is the vicar of a Protestant parish on the border of Northern Ireland and Southern Ireland, and Patrick is the priest at the Roman Catholic Church across the road.

One day they are seen together, erecting a sign which says,


“THE END IS NEAR. TURN YOURSELF AROUND NOW,
BEFORE IT IS TOO LATE.”

As a car speeds past them, the driver leans out his window and yells,

“Leave people alone, you religious nutters. We don’t need your lectures.”

From around the next curve they hear screeching tyres and a big splash.
Shaking his head, Father Patrick says “Dat’s da terd one dis mornin’.”


“Yaa,” Sean agrees, then adds, “Do ya tink maybe da sign should just say “BRIDGE CLOSED”?

 

 

(creator unknown)

Advertisements

DOGGIE  FOR A WALK

 

 A little girl asked her mother, “Mum, may I take the dog for a walk around the block?”

 Mum replies, “No, because she is on heat. “

 “What’s that mean?” asked the child.

 “Go ask your father, I think he’s in the garage.”

 The little girl goes to the garage and says, “Dad, may I take Belle for a walk around the block? I asked Mum, but she said the dog was on heat, and to come to you.”

 Dad said, “Bring Belle over here.”

 He took a rag, soaked it with petrol, and scrubbed the dog’s backside with it and said, “Okay, that should take care of that problem.

You can go now, but keep Belle on the leash and only go one time around the block.”

 The little girl left, and returned a few minutes later but with no dog on the leash.

 Surprised, Dad asked, “Where’s Belle?”

 The little girl said, “She ran out of petrol about halfway around the block, so another dog is pushing her home. “

 

(An email humour – Author Unknown)

London during spring season 2017

20170330_113814

Bursting with big blooms  (clicked at an Ilford front garden

20170330_113834

Does anyone know the name of this beautiful flower ?

20170330_185654

Blooms covering  entire leaves

20170329_151943

A tree still hasn’t woken up

20170330_185720

Fluffy blooms!

20170403_122153

Palm tree in a different angle

20170403_123004

Jet planes sketching  lines on the sky

Ides of March – 15th of March 2017

Every 15th of March referred as “The Ides of march” and once again we are having it today.

So why is it referred  as the IOM?

Once upon a time March was the first month of the Roman calendar.  The ancient Romans did not number the days of the month, instead based on 3 phases of the moon. The 3 lunar- phase- markers were named Kalends, Nones and Ides. The Ides indicated the full moon of that month, and being March the first month of the year, the first full moon was called “The Ides of March”. Romans marked the Ides of March with celebrations to welcome the new moon.

But Everything changed on 44 BC  Ides of March .

A coup was plotted against  Julius Caesar. Emperor of Rome was assassinated  on the Ides of March. History would tell you that his best mate Brutus was involved too.

Then came Shakespeare the playwright who quoted “Beware of the Ides of March” in his play  “The tragedy of  Julius Caesar” (~1599-1623). Since then the day has been scarred as bad omen.  Would you classify this as a bad omen? I will let you decide.

140 years ago (1877), the  inaugural  Test Cricket Match also  started  on an  Ides of March.

Cricket

 

Luck vs Hard work

Luck has a way of happening

To people who shoot high

And

Never sell them short!

The religious dove for peace!

It is a lovely depiction of peace  if and if all the religions come together. the image is poached from a facebook page author- unknown.

fb_img_1483420275631

Many faiths with one future

FUNERAL ANNOUNCEMENT

  • Hello Everyone ,

It is with our deepest heartfelt sympathy announcing  the death of our beloved friend and well known Mr 2016 .

He is survived by 12 wives,52 children and 365 grand children. *Funeral will take place on Saturday 31st December at 23 59 hrs*. For more information contact Mr January on phone number 01 01 2017.

However, his family members  have requested to inform  that he  has died accidentally with *ALL your problems, sickness, disappointment, frustration, untimely death, shame, disgrace, barrenness, discouragement, failure, and rejection.*

Yet, his successor – Mr 2017 asked  to inform you that he is going to compensate you with : *Long life, good health, abundant blessings, peace, joy, righteousness, promotion, uplifting & breakthrough.*
Please accept the obituary on behalf of 2016 family. 😣 😓 😧🍃