Archive | December 6, 2012

“Accept that some days you are the pigeon and some days you are the Statue”

Most of the open-air statues are weather-beaten and further transformed by nature-calls of birds and animals. The mishap is drastic if the unlucky figurine is positioned next to a beach or under a large tree.

My childhood  memory of a statue was in Jaffna, Sri Lanka.  This particular scout sculpture was erected in a neighbouring compound of the old Jaffna Secretariat (Kachcheri) along the curvy part of Kandy road. (I wonder whether  this scout statue still exists after a generation of war).

In those days, the three-dimensional work of art was periodically painted in brown by the authorities but within hours, the sculpture would be challenged by their two-legged foes.  The culprits were the Chundikuli crows and the yellow beaked Indian Myna lived on adjacent  Mahogany trees.

The head of the scout statue would be transformed by the birds as their dinner table cum loo. The effect of white faeces against the bright brown statue was an amusement for young and old.

Below is a detailed scenario which I caught on an  e-mai circulation.  This could only happen in our dreams…. (author unknown)

In a city park stood two statues, one female and the other male. These two statues faced each other for many years.

Early one morning an angel appeared before the statues and said, “Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish.  I hereby give you the gift of life.  You have  30 minutes to do whatever you desire.”  And with that command, the statues came to life.

The two statues smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping. After fifteen minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, “You still have fifteen  minutes.  Would you like to continue?”

The male statue looked at the female and asked, “Do you want to do it again?” Smiling, the female statue said, “Sure. But this time YOU hold the pigeon down and I’ll shit on its head!

Courtesy: Google images